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by Todd
(Plainfield Indiana 46168)

I’m 51 and nothing works out! My wife of 23 years said she wants a divorce and now I’m begging God to stop it! I want a purpose as well, something that says this is why God designed you but I feel nothing works out ever and now I’m lost even more and seeking pleasure like a sinner, and no I’m not cheating on my wife, I mean self! I’m seeking God's forgiveness and a strong change of our hearts to show her why God put me in her life as her husband! I’m a doubter and I keep punishing myself, I suffer from memories and how they take over my happiness. I don’t expect him to help me but I’ll keep begging.

Comments for Misery

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Feb 02, 2022

by: Elvin

Thank you for reaching out. You are obviously looking for an answer and God will bless you for that.
Todd, the first thing to keep in mind is that none of us are perfect and we just don’t always do the things that we should do. But we must move forward. It is the way we move forward that is important.
It is helpful to first forgive yourself and then forgive others. When we forgive, God honors that and blesses us for having a forgiving attitude. You are a child of God and just like any father that loves his children, God loves you.
So, how do you forgive? By words. First, to yourself, and if you can approach your wife, ask her to forgive you. Peter asked Jesus how many times we should forgive. Jesus answered 70 times 7 which is 490 times (Matthew 18:21-22). He was really saying as many times as necessary to cleanse your heart.
Several years ago, I was hurt deeply. I harbored the hurt and developed throat cancer from the stress of the hurt feelings. My unforgiveness only hurt me. When I realized what was happening, I asked God to help me. In the quiet of my room, I forgave this person. Every time something caused me to think of this person, I felt the pain, I would speak to myself and said I forgive you. It was gradual but each time I express forgiveness, the hurt decreased a little until finally, I did not feel bad feeling for this person. I must have expressed forgiveness a hundred times or more. I share this with you because I know that it works.
It is like washing a dirty rag. You may not get all the dirt out of the rag in the first washing but if you will keep washing the rag, it will release more dirt each time you wash it until it is clean. Jesus knew what he was saying.
Another reason forgiveness is important is that it hinders prayers. Mark 11: 25-26 says, "And whenever you stand praying, if you have anything against anyone, forgive him, that your Father in heaven may also forgive you your trespasses. 26 But if you do not forgive, neither will your Father in heaven forgive your trespasses."
It is important to know that God loves you and wants you to be happy more than you do. Ask God for his help and believe that he heard you and he will answer your prayer. Pray and after praying instead of asking for the same thing over and over, begin to thank God for the answer to your prayer.
Mark 11:24 says, "Therefore I say to you, whatever things you ask when you pray, believe that you receive them, and you will have them." You receive first in your spiritual man (believe that you receive them in your spirit) and then it manifests in the natural man (and you will have them). All prayers are first answered in the inner man before it is seen in the outer man. That is why we must believe and have faith.
You are seeking the truth and the truth will set you free.
I pray that these words will help you and give you hope. May God bless you in all that you do.

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